One girl, four boys, all under one roof. I'm living the dream... Not so much. Going from living with all girls to five girls and one boy, to being the only girl in a house takes a bit of getting used to but it's nothing if not interesting.
Here's what to expect being the lone lady living in a house full of males.
Disadvantages
1. FIFA Marathons
A site that regularly greets me is endless rounds of FIFA and good luck to you if you think you are getting a word out of them while they are playing. It's fine, I didn't want to talk to you about my day anyway.
2. Smelly Gear Bags
A house full of soccer players is not ideal unless you enjoy the smell of wet, sweaty clothes mixed with a faint hint of lynx that no longer hides the smell of the pungent, damp socks and boots. It's something you never become immune to.
3. Constant Sex References
A favourite for some of the lovely lads I live with is to change the lyrics of any song that happens to be playing to some awful sexual reference or some derogatory terminology involving various body parts. If you don't want your favourite songs ruined forever, pretend you have no musical preference.
4. Personal Hygiene and General Cleanliness
These aren't the strong points for a fair amount of male house-mates. Be prepared to find hairs and nails everywhere, the toilet seat will be left up and each one of their rooms looks and smells worse than the next, with the kitchen table and floor not far behind on the filthiness scale. Also, God forbid they are going on a lads' holiday - Veet cream and hairs all over the bathroom.
5. Obstacle Courses in the Living Room
One day its a makeshift putting green made using your drinking glass as the target, the next it's a mini basketball court using the top of the door frames as a net but regardless of the circuit set up on any given day there is a strong possibility you will do some damage to yourself by tripping over a stray football or wayward golf club.
6. Never Watch That 'Cute' Video
When your male house-mate says 'watch this' run in the opposite direction or firmly close your eyes and ears because whatever they are showing you is nine times out of ten NSFW (not safe for women).
7. Stealing Food
There was a rule unknown to me for quite some time in my house. If food is sitting on the table or counter it's fair game so put EVERYTHING you would like to eat in your own press or shelf on the fridge. The fact you obviously paid for the food is irrelevant if it's in the 'fair game' area and even sometimes when it's safely tucked away in your designated press. Basically, your food is never safe.
8. Burping and Farting
Nowhere is safe, not even your own room so just say their name in a fake angry voice, roll your eyes up to heaven and get over it.
9. Hands in Places They Shouldn't be
I'm not sure if I'm the only one that this annoys but why do guys think it's perfectly fine to wander around the house with their hands down their pants? It's awful, so please stop.
Now that I have slated the poor guys I live with I have to give them credit where credit is due.
Advantages
1. Hot Friends
There has to be some plus to putting up with their bad habits and there is: an endless supply of attractive men which is a definitive advantage.
2. Endless Entertainment
When they are not annoying you with their disgusting videos or constant FIFA playing they will have you laughing until your sides hurt at the stuff they say and do. They are a witty bunch in fairness.
3. Drama Free
Girls are bitchy, it's a known fact so it makes a nice change to come home to a house free of 'who did what to who' and 'I can't believe she said that to her'.
4. They Don't Steal Your Clothes
Well, not usually. It's reassuring to know that you won't come home to your favourite pair of jeans M.I.A. but yet you can steal their nice, comfy hoodies and they won't say a thing.
5. They Do Help Out
Bringing out the bin is a job no one wants but to be fair they do it without having to be asked. The same goes, usually for cleaning up after they cook. This can be a bone of contention among house-mates but mine are pretty good at packing the dishwasher.
6. You Feel Safer
This is probably a bit soppy but I feel safer in a house full of lads than girls if something bad were to happen, although with some of the men in my house I'd end up doing the protecting.
7. They Can Be Unexpectedly Thoughtful
Slumped on the couch with a banging headache after ten too many the night before is no fun for anyone but every now and then it's made better when your male house-mate brings you a can of club orange and a chicken fillet roll out of the blue.
While the downsides appear to outweigh the benefits, the fun that is had while living with all men trumps their rotten habits any day.
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