Ladies, gentlemen, lads and lassies. Welcome to the first installment of our new daily post, highlighting the celebrity stories that are taking over the internet for reasons beyond our understanding.
This nonsense is so pointless that we've neither the time nor the motivation to try and report on them straight up so here's a quick update to keep everyone in the loop.
Blake Lively got her hair done
The actress posted a photo on Instagram of herself on a bridge. Apparently it's a huge deal because her hair is different. I'm not sure how it was before. Maybe she had a mohawk? Who knows?
Ryan Reynolds might drop a baby
Meanwhile, Blake's husband and all round handsome man Ryan Reynolds has been forced to respond to fuckers with too much time on their hands, after they threw a wobbler over the way he was holding their baby. Fair enough, the child may not have been completely strapped in properly but given that Reynolds is not one but two superheros, you'd presume he's not going to drop a baby.
Happy Fathers Day!!! ... @vancityreynolds Since the day our baby was born, I've felt so strongly in my heart that you were most likely the father. ?????????#ILoveYouSoMuchItsSilly A photo posted by Blake Lively (@blakelively) on
'Jacqueline Jossa 'disgusted' by fiancé Dan Osborne's stab threats to ex-girlfriend'
I don't know who either of these people are but stabbing other human beings is wrong folks.
Miley Cyrus is still a dose
Today Miley is in the news because she wore glow in the dark contact lenses. In other news, I found an abnormally large crisp in my packet of Hunky Dorys this lunchtime.
Having a blast with glow in the dark contact lenses!! http://t.co/rWib7OegBH
— JEROME GELB (@drjgelb) July 8, 2015
The Kardashians and Jenners are at it again
One of them is topless, one of them is looking pregnant, one is splitting from her husband, one of the boyfriends is sending dick pics to someone who isn't a Kardashian or a Jenner and the other isn't wearing a bra. Which one did which? You decide.
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